Guess what I learned today?
It was soul-warming
It was life-changing
It was AMAZING!
First, I learned that God wants me to be rich, healthy, and not have any unpleasant circumstances in my life.
Second, I learned that by ordering a free "Red Prayer Handkerchief," I would be connected to Kerney Thomas and have all my hardships come to an end!
Third, I would donate money and then Kerney Thomas would "prophecy" to tell me what my problems were.
Last, he'd pray for me and make Satan let go of my body if I were sick or make him let go of my millions God wants me to have.
Yes, it was very touching. What else do you watch at 3:45 in the morning? It's either that, weather, cartoons that a 2-year-old would be bored with, or a weird TV show showing you all sorts of ways to die. (All I can say is there are a whole lot of dumb people out there.)
Yup, you guessed it. No church for Ben. The evil influences of Sin City have already taken hold on me.
Ok, so I was sick. I spent all day Friday wishing I hadn't gone to work. I had a feeling it was gunna be bad because I was achy and extremely restless all day. That night was one of those "longest nights of my life" experience. I don't seem to ever remember having had a real fever before, so it was kind of different... The achy stuff was miserable, but the showers every 15 minutes helped a bit. Oh, and last night, I sweat so much that every hour or so I'd wake up to dry off, my clothes would be so wet that is was as if I had gotten out of the shower and put my clothes on without drying off. Pretty cool, hu? (It's more like "cold" when you're covered in sweat, head to foot.) All I can say is they have some interesting germs floating around down here. I finally feel well enough to sit ...er... 2 feet from my bed at my computer. I'm so happy! Perfect excuse to waste time and be lazy!
Let me guess... I've lost about 75% of my readers.
6 comments:
EVIL!!!!!!!!! Not going to church?!!!! How dare you! Just because you feel miserable/are throwing up, doesn't mean you can't go to church!
I must be 1 of the 25% of the readers. :P I understood just about everything except for...
"I finally feel well enough to sit ...er... 2 feet from my bed at my computer."
After the "...er..." You need something to clarify what you did instead of sit. Unless you meant to show the readers that you were examining how far you were away from the bed. :D
Actually, it wasn't a stomach flu, so I was SO happy about that.
Hehe... Yeah.. Good point. It was meant more as "examining distance between bed and computer." You'll have to excuse my bad writing for now as I'm kind of out of it. The only thing I know is I'm feeling better so I'm incredibly happy.
Ha Ha. I made it to the end. I will now go to bed.
Ha Ha. I made it to the end. I will now go to bed.
All I can say is that I'm glad you have a picture.
Is that a hint? :-)
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